Q: What is a conservative?A: A liberal whos been mugged.

1. "Are you a member of any organized political party?" "No. Im a Republican."

- RATE / SHARE →

2. Q: Why do they always fly around a live turkey in a cage on Air Force 1?A: For spare parts.

- RATE / SHARE →

3. Why are Vampires Democrats?They want Gore in 2000.

- RATE / SHARE →

4. Q: If Rodham gets health care, Bentsen gets treasury, and Aspin gets defense, what does Gore get?A: Coffee.

- RATE / SHARE →

5. Late one night, a mugger wearing a ski mask jumped into the pathof a well-dressed man and stuck a gun in his ribs. "Give me yourmoney", he demanded. Indignant, the affluent man replied, "Hey, watch it - Im a UnitedStates Congressman!" "In that case," replied the mugger, "give me MY money."

- RATE / SHARE →

6. Republicans always take the price tag off expensive gifts before wrapping. Democrats also remove price tags off pricey gifts ... and reposition them to make sure they are seen.

- RATE / SHARE →

7. Democrats wear wide red ties and green sports jackets during the festive season. Republicans do too, all year round.

- RATE / SHARE →

8. Q: How many Labour Party members does it take to change a lightbulb ? A: None. They havent got a policy on that.

- RATE / SHARE →

9. Q: What is the difference between a liberal and a puppy?A: A puppy stops whining after it grows up.

- RATE / SHARE →

10. When that fool Reagan said that the Soviet Union was a failedexperiment headed for the ash heap of history, I knew he was ademagogue.When that fool Reagan said that the Soviet Union was an evilempire, I knew he was a dangerous kook.When that fool Reagan said that we could end the Cold War byescalating the arms race, I knew the odds favored nuclearannihilation.When the Soviet Union went broke, dissolved, and repudiatedits past, I knew it was all Gorbachevs genius, and that fool Reaganhad nothing to do with it.Because if that fool Reagan was right all along......what kind of fool am I?

- RATE / SHARE →