A reporter was interviewing a 104 year-old woman: "And what do you think is the best thing about being 104?" the reporter asked.She simply replied, "No peer pressure."

1. A reporter was interviewing a 104 year-old woman: "And what do you think is the best thing about being 104?" the reporter asked.She simply replied, "No peer pressure."

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2. Whats the worst thing about having to kiss Grandma?When the damn coffin lid falls and hits you in the head.

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3. Two 80 year old men are driving down the road when they hear the Ex-Lax commercial end with the statement: "It makes you feel young again." John looks at Sylvester and says, "We need to pull over and get a bottle of that stuff!" Sylvester agrees and the two old men pull over and get a bottle of Ex-Lax. They both take two tablespoons each and continue to drive. About one mile later Sylvester asks, "Well John, do you feel young yet?" "No," replies John. So they pull over and take four more tablespoons a piece and continue to drive down the road. A couple of miles later, Sylvester asks, "John, do you feel younger?" "No," replies John, "but I sure did a childish thing!"

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4. Do you think my skin is starting to show its age?""I cant tell. There are too many wrinkles."

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5. Q: Why did the old lady put wheels on her rocking chair?A: She wanted to rock and roll

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6. Grandpa: You youngsters are soft and lazy today. When I was your age I got up at six oclock every morning and walked five or six miles before breakfast. I used to think nothing of it. Fred: I dont blame you, Grandpa. I wouldnt think,much of it myself.

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7. One day a lady was driving on the Highway. She frequently checked her speed gauge to make sure she stayed within the speed limit. However, when she looked into her rear mirror, much to her dismay, she saw a police car not far behind! And, to make matters worse, the police car turned on his flashing lights. She thought to herself, "Uh-oh, what have I done now? Im not speeding. Im not drinking. I have my seat belt on! I have kept up my license dues and everything!"So, she pulled over and the police car pulled over to the side right behind her car. She drove her car slowly to a stop, slowly rolled down the window, and prepared for a ticket when she knew she didnt deserve it. A policeman walked up to her window, and spoke to her. The lady pointed to her ear and shook her head, meaning she was deaf. The policeman

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8. Ive sure gotten old. Ive had two By-pass surgeries. A hip replacement, new knees. Fought prostate cancer, and diabetes. Im half blind, cant hear anything quieter than a jet engine, take 40 different medications that make me dizzy, winded, and subject to blackouts. Have bouts with dementia. Have poor circulation, hardly feel my hands and feet anymore. Cant remember if Im 85 or 92. Have lost all my friends.But.....Thank God, I still have my Florida drivers license!

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9. Two elderly women were out driving in a large car-both could barely see over the dashboard. As they were cruising along they came to an intersection. The stoplight was red but they just went on through. The woman in the passenger seat thought to herself "I must be losing it, I could have sworn we just went through a red light." After a few more minutes they came to another intersection and the light was red again and again they went right though. This time the woman in the passenger seat was almost sure that the light had been red but was really concerned that she was losing it. She was getting nervous and decided to pay very close attention to the road and the next intersection to see what was going on. At the next intersection, sure enough, the light was definitely red and they went right through and she tu

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10. An 80 year old couple were having problems remembering things, so they decided to go to their doctor to get checked out to make sure nothing was wrong with them. When they arrived at the doctors, they explained to the doctor about the problems they were having with their memory. After checking the couple out, the doctor tells them that they were physically okay but might want to start writing things down and make notes to help them remember things. The couple thanked the doctor and left. Later that night while watching TV, the old man got up from his chair and his wife asks, "Where are you going?" He replies, "To the kitchen." She asks, "Will you get me a bowl of ice cream?" He replies, "Sure." She then asks him, "Dont you think you should write it down so you can remember it?" He says, "No, I can remember th

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