Why all Pascal programmers ask to live in Atlantis?Because it is below C level.

1. How many C++ programmers does it take to change a light bulb?"Youre still thinking procedurally! A properly designed light bulb object would inherit a change method from a generic light bulb class!"

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2. What did the mouse say to the webcam?Cheese.

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3. A technician advised his customer to put his troubled floppy back in the drive and close the door. The customer put the disk in, asked the tech to hold on, and was heard putting the phone down, getting up and closing the door to his room.

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4. A system programmer came home from work almost at dawn and told his wife enthusiastically: "Tonight I have installed a new release of MVS/ESA together with VM/CMS and CICS/VS"."G.O.O.D" answered his wife.

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5. Q: What is the difference between Windows 95 and Windows 98? A: 3 years

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6. The programmer to his son: "Here, I brought you a new basketball.""Thank you, daddy, but where is the users guide?"

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7. My computer made a funny sound the other day.Of course, Ive never heard it get thrown out a window before.

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8. If Microsoft built cars you would need to restart your car, then it would perform illegal operations and crash.

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9. What do computer experts do at weekends?Go for a disk drive.

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10. A tech support employee once received a call from a disgruntled lady who had purchase one of their PCs. "The cup holder on my computer broke! I just got some coffee and put it in the cup holder and then it broke, and the coffee spilled all over me! I want a replacement!" The employee was a little confused and didnt know what to say. He finally asked her to describe the cup holder to him...hed never heard of his company selling in-computer cup holders. So the lady went on to describe the cup holder to him. "Well, it pops out of the little box when I push a button, and it has 40x written on it..."

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