What did the biscuit say when it saw two friends knocked down? Crumbs!

1. Would you like a duck egg for supper? Only if you quack it for me.

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2. Two flies were on a cornflakes packet. "Why are we running so fast?" asked one. "Because," said the second, "it says tear along the dotted line!"

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3. When Lee ate raw onions for a week what did he become? Lone Lee.

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4. At a party, a conjurer was producing egg after egg from a little boys ear. "There!" he said proudly. "I bet your Mum cant produce eggs without hens, can she?" "Oh yes, she can," said the boy. "She keeps ducks."

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5. Why cant you make bread like my mother? I would if you could make dough like your father!

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6. Sign in restaurant window: "Eat now - Pay waiter."

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7. Q: Ever wonder about people who pay $2 for a bottle of Evian water?A: Just spell "Evian" backwards!

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8. A family of three tomatoes were walking downtown one day when the little baby tomato started lagging behind. The big father tomato walks back to the baby tomato, stomps on her, squashing her into a red paste, and says, "Ketchup!"

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9. When the waitress in a New York City restaurant brought him the soup du jour, the Englishman was a bit dismayed. "Good heavens," he said, "what is this?""Why, its bean soup," she replied."I dont care what it has been," he sputtered. "What is it now?"

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10. What did the female mushroom say about the male mushroom?"Hes a real fun guy [fungi]."

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