Patient: I always see spots before my eyes.Doctor: Didnt the new glasses help?Patient: Sure, now I see the spots much clearer.

1. 1) Why did the nurse keep the bedpan in the refrigerator?Because when she kept it in the freezer it took too much skin off.

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2. Doctor, Doctor I think Im a mothGet out of the way, your in my light!

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3. Doctor, Doctor Ive broke my arm in two places Well dont go back there again then!

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4. Doctor, doctor I keep thinking Im a beeBuzz off cant you see Im busy?

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5. Doctor, Doctor my son has swallowed my pen, what should I do?Use a pencil till I get there

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6. Fireman rescued a man who was badly injured in a car accident. The entire left half of his body was torn off. He was taken to the hospital and examined. The doctors said he was all right. The nurses said there wasnt much left.

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7. A man needing a heart transplant is told by his doctor that the only heart available is that of a sheep. The man finally agrees and the doctor transplants the sheep heart into the man. A few days after the operation, the man comes in for a checkup. The doctor asks him "How are you feeling?" The man replies "Not BAAAAD!"

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8. Doctor, Doctor I think Im a butterflyWill you say what you mean and stop flitting about!

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9. Doctor Doctor I feel like a racehorse.Take one of these every 4 laps!

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10. Jack went to see the camp nurse. I fell last night, he said. And I was unconscious for eight hours.The nurse was shocked. How awful. What happened?I fell asleep!

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