Halloween Jokes Category

1. A boy went to a Halloween party with a sheet over his head. "Are you here as a ghost?" asked his friends. "No," he replied, "Im an unmade bed." Another boy wore a sheet over his head. "Are you an unmade bed?" asked his friends. "No, Im an undercover agent," he replied.

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2. A boy went to a Halloween party with a sheet over his head.Are you here as a ghost ? asked his friendsNo, Im an undercover agent".

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3. A Toledo man was admitted to the city hospital last night with severe burns after dunking for French fries at a Halloween party.

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4. At 5 P.M. one Halloween afternoon, my dental hygienist realized that she wouldnt make it to the store in time to get snacks for trick-or-treaters. So she took home some free samples from the office supply cabinet. That night she handed out dozens of toothbrushes, toothpaste, and dental floss. The next year, although she had bags of chips and popcorn, not one child came knocking at her door.

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5. Doctor, doctor, Im so ugly. What can I do about it? Hire yourself out for Halloween parties.

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6. Girl 1: "Can I invite a few friends to your Halloween party?"Girl 2: "Sure. The more, the scarier!"

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7. How do you get the most apples when bobbing at Halloween Wear a snorkel !

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8. How do zombies celebrate Halloween? They paint the town dead!

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9. One Halloween this woman opens her door to find the most adorable little girl, with golden blond curly hair and the biggest blue eyes. She was dressed as an Angel, and was just delightful. The woman said, "what are you supposed to say sweetheart?"The little girl looks up at the woman and says "Twick or Tweat!" The woman thinks this is just adorable, and she calls her husband to come to the door. The woman say to the child, "Go ahead honey say it just one more time." Once again the little Angel looks up and says, "Twick or Tweat!" The husband agrees with his wife, this little Angel is just the cutest thing. The woman picks an apple from the Treat Bowl, shines it up with her apron, and drops it into the little girls Treat Bag.The little Angel looks in her bag then looks up at the woman and says, "Thanks a lot lady, you just broke my f**king cookies!"

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10. Q: What do birds give out on Halloween? A: Tweets.

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11. Q: What do little trees say on Halloween? A: Twig or treat.

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12. Q: Whats Osama Bin Laden going to be for Halloween? A: Dead.

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13. What did the ghost serve at his Halloween party? Hallowieners!

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14. What did the really ugly man do for a living? He posed for Halloween masks.

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15. What do birds say on Halloween? "Trick-or-tweet!"

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16. What do fishermen say on Halloween? "Trick-or-trout!"

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17. What do rednecks do on Halloween?Pump-kin!

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18. What do stupid kids do at Halloween ?They carve a face on an apple and go bobbing for pumpkins !

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19. What do witches eat at Halloween ?Spooketti, halloweenies, devils food cake and booberry pie !

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20. What do witches eat at Halloween? Spook-etti, Halloweenies, Devils food cake and Boo-berry pie.

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21. What do you call a bug that bothers dogs on Halloween? A trick-or-fleat!

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22. What happened to the girl who wore a mouse costume to her Halloween party? The cat ate her.

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23. What happened when the girl dressed as a spoon left the Halloween party ?No one moved. They couldnt stir without her.

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24. What happened when the girl dressed as a spoon left the Halloween party? No one moved. They couldnt stir without her.

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25. What is a childss favourite type of Halloween candy? Lots a candy.

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26. What kind of make up was the girl wearing on Halloween?Mash-scara!

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27. What kind of protozoa likes Halloween?An amoeboo!

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28. What would you get if you crossed Halloween with Christmas? A ghoul Yule!

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29. What would you get if you crossed Halloween with Independence Day? The Fourth of Ghoul-ly!

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30. Where do ghoulies go to on the day before Halloween party? To the boo-ty parlour.

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31. Wheres the most dangerous place to go trick-or-treating? On the psycho path!

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32. Who turns the lights off at halloween ?The lights witch !

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33. Why are teachers happy at Halloween parties? Because theres lots of school spirit!

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34. Why arent burgers the least bit scared of Halloween?Theyre used to people goblin them!

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35. Why did the boy carry a clock and a bird on Halloween ?It was for tick or tweet !

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36. Why did the wizard wear a yellow robe to the Halloween party?He was going as a banana.

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37. Why is the air so clean and healthy on Halloween? Because so many witches are sweeping the sky.

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38. Why is the air so clean and healthy on Halloween? Because so many witches are sweeping the sky.

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39. Why was the boy unhappy to win the prize for the best costume at the Halloween party? Because he just came to pick up his little sister.

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40. Why were the trick-or-treaters wearing grass skirts? Because it was Hulaween!

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