Elephant Jokes (116)

1. A boy with an elephant on his head went to see a doctor. The doctor said, "You know you really need help""Yes I do", said the elephant, "get this kid off my foot !"

Added over 10 years ago in Elephant jokes  

2. An elephant was walking in a park. With each step he took, he squished many little ants. Upset, the ants began to crawl up on the elephant -- first his legs and then up all over his body. When the elephant started feeling all the little ants on him, he shook hard, making all the little ants, except for one, fall to the ground. As the only ant on the elephant hung on close to the elephants neck, the ones on the ground began to yell, "Strangle him!!! Strangle him!!!"

Added over 10 years ago in Elephant jokes  

3. Bill:"My homework is really difficult tonight, Ive to write an essay on an elephant."?Bert:"Well, for a start your going to need a big ladder.."

Added over 10 years ago in Elephant jokes  

4. Have you heard about the elephant that went on a crash diet ?He wrecked three cars, a bus and two fire engines !

Added over 10 years ago in Elephant jokes  

5. How can you tell if there is an elephant in your dessert ?You get very lumpy ice cream !

Added over 10 years ago in Elephant jokes  

6. How do you fit five elephants into a car ?Two in the front, two in the back and the other in the glove compartment !

Added over 10 years ago in Elephant jokes  

7. How do you get an elephant into a matchbox ?Take all the matches out first !

Added over 10 years ago in Elephant jokes  

8. How do you hire an elephant ?Stand it on four bricks !

Added over 10 years ago in Elephant jokes  

9. How do you know that peanuts are fattening ?Have you ever seen a skinny elephant ?

Added over 10 years ago in Elephant jokes  

10. How do you make an elephant sandwich? First of all, you get a very large loaf...

Added over 10 years ago in Elephant jokes  

11. How do you raise a baby elephant ?With a fork lift truck !

Added over 10 years ago in Elephant jokes  

12. How do you stop an angry elephant from charging ?Take away its credit cards !

Added over 10 years ago in Elephant jokes  

13. How does an elephant get down from a tree ?He sits on a leaf and waits till autumn !

Added over 10 years ago in Elephant jokes  

14. How does an elephant get out of a small car ?The same way that he got in !

Added over 10 years ago in Elephant jokes  

15. How does an elephant go up a tree? It stands on an acorn and waits for it to grow.

Added over 10 years ago in Elephant jokes  

16. How to elephants talk to each other ?By elephone !

Added over 10 years ago in Elephant jokes  

17. How to you tell the difference between an elephant and a mouse ?Try picking them up !

Added over 10 years ago in Elephant jokes  

18. Is the squirt from an elephants trunk very powerful?Well, a jumbo jet can keep 500 people oin the air for hours at a time !

Added over 10 years ago in Elephant jokes  

19. It was a boring Sunday afternoon in the jungle so the Elephants decided to challenge the Ants to a game of soccer. The game was going well with the Elephants beating the Ants ten goals to nil, when the Ants gained possession. The Ants star player was dribbling the ball towards the Elephants goal when the Elephants left back came lumbering towards him.The elephant trod on the little ant, killing him instantly. The referee stopped the game. "What the hell do you think youre doing? Do you call that sportsmanship, killing another player?" The elephant replied, "Well, I didnt mean to kill him -- I was just trying to trip him up."

Added over 10 years ago in Elephant jokes  

20. My elephants got no trunk ?How does it smell ?Terrible !

Added over 10 years ago in Elephant jokes  

Random Joke Trending Jokes Top Rated Jokes