Dentist Jokes (69)

1. "Did you get your money?" ask the wife of the dentist who had just return from the delinquent patients home."Not a cent," growled the dentist, "and worse than that, he insulted me, and gnashed my teeth at me!"

Added over 10 years ago in Dentist jokes  

2. "I am sorry, madam, but I shall have to charge you hundred dollars for pulling your boys tooth.""Hundred dollars! Why, I understood you to say that you charged only twenty dollars for such work!""Yes," replied the dentist, "but this youngster yelled so terribly that he scared out four other patients out of the office."

Added over 10 years ago in Dentist jokes  

3. "I came in to make an appointment with the dentist." said the man to the receptionist." "Im sorry sir." she replied. "Hes out right now, but..." "Thank you." interrupted the obviously nervous prospective patient. "When will he be out again ?"

Added over 10 years ago in Dentist jokes  

4. "I came in to make an appointment with the dentist." said the man to the receptionist."Im sorry sir." she replied. "Hes out right now, but...""Thank you," interrupted the obviously nervous prospective patient. "When will he be out again ?"

Added over 10 years ago in Dentist jokes  

5. "Open wider." requested the dentist, as he began his examination of the patient. "Good God !" he said startled. "Youve got the biggest cavity Ive ever seen - the biggest cavity Ive ever seen." "OK Doc !" replied the patient. "Im scared enough without you saying something like that twice." "I didnt !" said the dentist. "That was the echo."

Added over 10 years ago in Dentist jokes  

6. A dentist, after completing work on a patient, came to him begging.Dentist: Could you help me? Could you give out a few of your loudest, most painful screams?Patient: Why? Docor, it wasnt all that bad this time.Dentist: There are so many people in the waiting room right now, and I dont want to miss the four oclock ball game.

Added over 10 years ago in Dentist jokes  

7. A husband and wife entered the dentists office. The husband said, "I want a tooth pulled. I dont want gas or Novocain because Im in a terrible hurry. Just pull the tooth as quickly as possible.""Youre a brave man," said the dentist. "Now, show me which tooth it is."The husband turns to his wife and says, "Open your mouth and show the dentist which tooth it is, dear."

Added over 10 years ago in Dentist jokes  

8. A man went to his dentist because he feels something wrong in his mouth.The dentist examines him and says, "that new upper plate I put in for you six months ago is eroding. What have you been eating?"The man replies, "all I can think of is that about four months ago my wife made some asparagus and put some stuff on it that was delicious ... Hollandaise sauce. I loved it so much I now put it on everything --- meat, toast, fish, vegetables, everything.""Well," says the dentist, "thats probably the problem. Hollandaise sauce is made with lots of lemon juice, which is highly corrosive. Its eaten away your upper plate. Ill make you a new plate, and this time use chrome.""Why chrome?" asks the patient. To which the dentist replies, "Its simple. Everyone knows that ... theres no plate like chrome for the Hollandaise!"

Added over 10 years ago in Dentist jokes  

9. A patient asked the dentist, if it wasnt nasty to be all the day with the hands in someones mouth.The dentist answered "I just think of it as having my hands in their wallet."

Added over 10 years ago in Dentist jokes  

10. A patient came to his dentist with problems with his teeth.Patient: Doctor, I have yellow teeth, what do I do?Dentist: Wear a brown tie!

Added over 10 years ago in Dentist jokes  

11. Anyone know the six most frightening words in the world ??? "The Dentist will see you now."

Added over 10 years ago in Dentist jokes  

12. As the judge said to the dentist: Do you swear to pull the tooth, the whole tooth, and nothing but the tooth?

Added over 10 years ago in Dentist jokes  

13. At what time do most people go to the dentist?At tooth-hurty (2:30).

Added over 10 years ago in Dentist jokes  

14. believe that the members of the dental profession are the only men who can tell a women to open or close her mouth and get away with it.

Added over 10 years ago in Dentist jokes  

15. Cloyd went to a Charleston dentist complaining his gums had shriveled up and his teeth were falling out. After examining him, the dentist said, "Your mouth is really bad. Do you brush?" "Ah sure do!" replied Cloyd. "Everee single day!" "What do you brush with?" asked the dentist, "Preparation H," said the redneck.

Added over 10 years ago in Dentist jokes  

16. Dentist begging the patient: Could you help me? Could you give out a few of your loudest, most painful screams?Patient: Why? Doc, it isnt all that bad this time.Dentist: There are so many people in the waiting room right now and I dont want to miss the 4 oclock ball game.

Added over 10 years ago in Dentist jokes  

17. Dentist to parsimonious patient "No, we give no discount for empty spaces when cleaning and polishing teeth Mrs. Borde!"

Added over 10 years ago in Dentist jokes  

18. Dentist: "You dont need to open your mouth any wider. When I pull your tooth I expect to stand outside."

Added over 10 years ago in Dentist jokes  

19. Dentist: Dont worry. Im painless.Patient: Im not.

Added over 10 years ago in Dentist jokes  

20. Dentist: I have to pull the aching tooth, but dont worry it will take just five minutes.Patient: And how much will it cost?Dentist: Its $90.00. Patient: $90.00 for just a few minutes work???Dentist: I can extract it very slowly if you like.

Added over 10 years ago in Dentist jokes  

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