Aardvark Jokes Category

1. A man wanted a new aardvark so he looked through the classified ads. He phoned a number he found and an elderly lady answered. "How much are your aardvarks?" he asked. "Theyre L6 each," came the reply. "Did you raise them yourself?" inquired the man. "Oh yes," she said, "Yesterday they were only L5 each."

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2. Did you hear about the household appliance that eats ants and records TV shows?Its the VCRdvard

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3. hello bob click here!

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4. How do ants hide from aardvarks?They disguise themselves as uncles!

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5. How do you define an aardvark?Aan aanimal that resembles an aanteater!

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6. How many aardvarks can ride on an elephant?Six... three on the back and three in the trunk!

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7. Ive got a new aardvark. Would you like to play with him? I dont really know. Ive heard it growling, it doesnt sound very friendly. Does it bite? Thats what I want to find out.

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8. Read more Aardvark jokes

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9. Read more Accountant jokes

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10. Read more Ant jokes

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11. Read more Apple jokes

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12. Two aardvarks watched in amazement as a firework flashed across the sky. 1st aardvark: Wow! I wish I could fly like that. 2nd aardvark: You would, if your tail was on fire.

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13. What are the aardvarks favorite Beatles songs?Its Been an Aards Days Night and I Want to Hold Your Ant!

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14. What command does the aardvark give most often when he sails?Snout about!

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15. What did the aardvark say when he lost the race to the ant?If you cant beat em, eat em!

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16. What did the impatient waiter ask the gluttonous aardvark?Is that your final ant, sir!

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17. What do you call a boxing match between two aardvarks?A snout bout!

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18. What do you call a pickled aardvark?A jarredvark!

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19. What do you call a Polish aardvark?A Polaark!

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20. What do you call a thick-skinned aardvark?A hardvark!

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21. What do you call a three-footed aardvark?A yardvark!

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22. What do you call an aardvark astronaut?A starredvark!

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23. What do you call an aardvark good with a light saber?A darthvark!

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24. What do you call an aardvark in a frying pan?A lardvark!

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25. What do you call an aardvark outside Buckingham Palace?A guardvark!

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26. What do you call an aardvark that plays poker?A cardvark!

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27. What do you call an aardvark that writes poems?A bardvark!

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28. What do you call an aardvark thats been thrown out of a pub?A barredvark!

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29. What do you call an aardvark thats good at golf?A paredvark!

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30. What do you call an aardvark thats just lost a fight?A vark!

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31. What do you call an aardvark thats just won a fight?A well aardvark!

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32. What do you call an road construction aardvark?A tarredvark!

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33. What does an aardvark get when he overeats?Ant-digestion!

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34. What does an aardvark keep in his aquarium? An aard-shark!

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35. What does an aardvark keep in his aquarium?An aard-shark!

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36. What does an aardvark take for ant-digestion?Anta-Seltzer!

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37. What does an aardvark use when he has a cold?An ant-ihistamine!

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38. What does the aardvark call his dog? Aard-bark!

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39. What does the aardvark call his dog?Aard-bark!

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40. What does the aardvark take sailing?An aard ark!

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41. What has 200 legs, 50 noses, and is very loud?A herd of stampeding aardvarks!

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42. What has six legs, two arms, four eyes and a tail? A man holding an aardvark.

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43. What is the difference between an aardvark and a coyote? One has a long smeller, the other, a loud yeller!

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44. What is the difference between an aardvark and a coyote?One has a long smeller, the other, a loud yeller!

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45. What is uglier than an aardvark? Two aardvarks!

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46. What is uglier than an aardvark?Two aardvarks!

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47. Whats worse than a giraffe with a sore throat?An aardvark with the sniffles!

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48. When is an aardvark jumpy?When hes got ants in his pants!

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49. Where does the aardvark family always come first?In the phone book!

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50. Which aardvark holds the speed record?The nearsighted aardvark, who wrapped his tongue around a motorcycle!

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51. Who has a long nose, wears a mask, and sits tall in the saddle?The Lone Aardvark!

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52. Who is the Lone Aardvarks faithful Indian companion?Tanto

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53. Who loves hamburgers, French fries, and ants? Ronald MacAardvark!

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54. Who loves hamburgers, French fries, and ants?Ronald MacAardvark!

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55. Who won the animal race?The giraffe and the aardvark were running neck and neck, but the aardvark won by a nose!

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56. Whos aardvarks favorite male singer?Frank Sinostril!

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57. Whos the aardvarks favorite female vocalist?Bearbara Streis-ant!

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58. Why can elephants swim - and aardvarks cant?Aardvarks dont have trunks!

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59. Why do aardvarks like to talk to ants?They can stick to the subject!

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60. Why do aardvarks make undesirable neighbors?Because they always have their noses in other peoples business!

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61. Why does mama aardvark call her husband a cannibal?Because he ate his ant for dinner!

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62. Why was Easter the aardvarks favorite holiday?Because he liked aard-boiled eggs!

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